Not yo' mamma's mapquest

Yesterday I'm laying on my bed and my mom comes into my room.....

- E, can you find how to get here?

- Sure mom, no problem. Do you want a map?

- Yes. Find, if closer to San Ramon from Oakland or San Jose.

- Okay mom. Going to, or coming from where?

- Here.

- Here, our house?

- No, here address, here.

- Okay mom, I'll look at it. So where are you starting from and then going to.

- Starting from here, then going there, or San Ramon or San Jose.

- Huh? Starting from our house then going to San Jose/San Ramon?

- No starting here not our house.

- So starting from that address you have in your hand?

- No, starting from San Ramon/San Jose to here.

- Wait, here home, or here there, that address?

- Just give me maps! Tell internet find directions and maps.

- Okay, mom. I'll give you maps. I'll tell internet find directions and maps.

I handed here 5 different maps. I'm still not sure where here, there, starting, stopping, or what the hell it was she was asking me for. Mom seems to think that you just ask the internet anything and it will tell you all you want to know. *sigh* So if any of you find my mother wandering around San Ramon, San Jose, here or there please call me on my cell phone and I'll go find her.